Ficlet: Think First

[quiet_tiger]

Title: Think First
Author: Quiet Tiger
Universe: General
Genre: Drama
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Batman, Superman
Word Count: 477
Warnings: None.
Summary: Batman tries to get through to Superman.

Note: For batfic_contest theme "Common Sense."


~*~

“It’s not like I meant for this happen!” The words hissed out between Superman’s clenched teeth. The pain must be excruciating.

“I know.” Batman tried not to scowl. Really. But Superman made him angry sometimes. “But smashing through the lead door, in a Luthor facility, when you know that Lex knows your weakness and will hurt you just for kicks…”

Batman used his tweezers to pull out yet another sliver of Kryptonite. The weapon had exploded when Superman had broken through the door, shooting pieces of the poisonous rock which then penetrated the normally invulnerable skin. So here they were, sitting in a filthy alley behind a LexCorp lab, Batman carefully extracting tiny pieces of Kryptonite from his friend.

After a deep breath Superman answered, “I had to make sure of what was behind the door since I couldn’t see through it.”

“But it’s common sense: if someone knows your weaknesses, don’t go into a room that might as well have a neon sign declaring ‘It’s a Trap!’ without adequate protection.”

Superman frowned even harder, though this time from annoyance rather than pain. “Sometimes the necessity of action doesn’t allow for serious consideration of every possible unlikely outcome.”

“It should.” Two more splinters, and Superman was starting to look less green. Batman was grateful, but still frustrated with the Boy Scout. “You’re too valuable to lose over some stupid decision you didn’t think through. I train my partners to think quickly under pressure to calculate options and probabilities of consequences for their actions. Your brain functions at an infinitely higher rate than theirs” – in theory– “so it should make better decisions more quickly. We can work on that.”

“You make helping me sound like an insult. Thanks.” Batman pulled out a slice of Kryptonite maybe a bit too harshly. “It was an accident.”

“Accidents can be deadly.” Maybe Superman would get it now. When he didn’t think was when he was most vulnerable. Anyone could plan ahead so long as he or she bothered to. “Thinking and listening to your instincts can save your life.”

More resigned this time, Superman agreed, “I know. I’ll be more careful. It’s not like I want to be a pin cushion.”

“Almost done.” And that was it; three minutes later Superman was free of Kryptonite. …for now. “All right. Luthor is long gone from here, and I need to get back to Gotham.”

“Thanks. I need to grab a new costume and see if I can track down any leads.”

Batman nodded, and was soon on his way back to the Cave. How a man as smart as Kal just didn’t think was frustrating. Losing him because of a stupid mistake would be devastating.

The problem with common sense was that it was impossible to teach. But hopefully Superman would figure it out. Especially before Batman had to strangle him himself.

~*~

A/N: Clark does stuff like this all the time on Smallville and it drives me nuts.

Comments

[lilacs-roses.livejournal.com]

A/N: Clark does stuff like this all the time on Smallville and it drives me nuts.

This fic was completely warranted given the above -- thanks so much for stating it!! /wry laugh.

You have to wonder how he's lived so long... I mean, even cats only have 9 lives with regards to their own curiosity ;)

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

It just confuses me that, when he knows he's dealing with people who know his one weakness, he just charges into things. Even without lead around he never looks before he leaps.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[saavikam77.livejournal.com]

Oh, Clark. *sigh*

Bruce is totally right. (And I want to throttle SV Clark for the same shit all the time, too.)

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

Clark is lucky he's cute, am I right?

As much as I'm sure Bruce annoys the heck out of Clark, sometimes he has something relevant and not Bat-snooty to say!

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[maigie2010.livejournal.com]

LOL!!! This was so apt. I think Kryptonians/Kandorians don't have the genetic DNA that codes for common sense.

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

You really have to wonder how they survived so long on Krypton! I just do not understand Clark.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[angelinachaser7.livejournal.com]

Yeah I use to watch Smallville, but that whole show annoyed me, I wasn't a big fan of the writers or the director either, lol, But I blame uni for that. Good story, I love how frustrated Bruce was, trying to drum some sense into Clark, but as they say common sense is very common these days.

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

The show annoyed me, too, but this last season has been pretty enjoyable thus far.

I think Clark frustrates Bruce for many reasons, this being only one of them, though a big one.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[ladyblkrose.livejournal.com]

The problem with common sense was that it was impossible to teach. But hopefully Superman would figure it out. Especially before Batman had to strangle him himself.

~*~

A/N: Clark does stuff like this all the time on Smallville and it drives me nuts.

Poor Bruce, having to come in to rescue his boy from his lack of common sense. Great take on the classic issue betwee these two. Batman lecturing Superman indicating he was less trainrd than a Robin was fun and true.

Your A/N was one of the reasons I coudn't get into SV

Thanks for sharing dear

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

You know Clark drives Bruce crazy, this being only one reason!

The Robins have to learn how to take care of themselves in a way Clark never has to worry about, but it sure is time he start thinking a bit more before acting.

There's a definite reason why fandom refered to SV Clark as Big Dumb Alien. :)

Glad you liked it, thanks for reading and commenting!

[dreamerelusive.livejournal.com]

I KNOW. Oh god, Smallville. Lana is like this, too! I usually have no problem with her, but sometimes she's just way too dumb to still be alive. It's like those horror movies where all this creepy shit has been happening all night but the female lead still decides to go have a long, indulgent, naked shower.

Adorable little story- Bruce should put Clark in training with Dick (or Jay/Tim, depending on when this takes place)!

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

For all that Smallville does well, it's stupid crap like Clark being a moron that makes it hard to watch! Just knock the door down, Clark, don't run inside without looking first!

Glad you liked it! Clark should definitely go through some training, or at least go on patrol Bat-style to get an idea of why being careful is important.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[arch-schatten.livejournal.com]

Well done, Superman. His lack of roundabout plans is fun, but such a magnet for trouble. I like your exasperated/worried Batman! he walks that line very well, it's very endearing X)

Also, hi! hope you had a good wintery holidays time!

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

His crash-and-bash style works a lot of the time, but not if he's dealing with someone who knows his weakness!

I was hoping Batman would come across well here, as being concerned but deeply annoyed because Clark is so different from the way he himself is.

My holiday was all right, not great. Highlights included a sweet Batman hoody from Dann's mom, and a beautiful necklace from Dann. I hope your holiday was nice!

[zeejaybay.livejournal.com]

Ha. I'll heed your warning about Smallville as it is much appreciated. Thanks for sharing.

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

Smallville has gotten better in its final season, but Clark still rushes into things.

Glad you liked it, thanks for reading and commenting!

[realpestilence.livejournal.com]

Very, very true that intelligence and common sense aren't the same thing, and that you can have one but not always both! Clark is a good example of stupid-smart, lol. I love that "in theory". He needs some Batman training! :D


This is kind of the flip side of the fic where Clark lectures Bruce. I say Clark got off more lightly. ~head smacks him

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

Clark is definitely one of those people that you can't help but love but also want to strangle.

And yeah, I like exploring the dynamic between Clark and Bruce, either Clark being a doofus or Bruce being a doofus. They drive each other crazy but they also need each other.

Thanks for reading and commenting!