quiet_tiger | Last Night's Smallville

What was it? "Hidden"? Like the episode's main plot?

I kid.

Right off the bat, this episode gets points for guest starring Johnny Lewis. I squeed happily when I recognized him. Coincidently, right now I'm wearing my Squee shirt, but the Jhonen Vazquez type squee, not the sound of pure fangirl joy.

I loved Johnny when he was on Quintuplets. I liked that show in general, the characters, story, etc. His character, Pearce, was awesome, and I'm glad I got to see Johnny in something else. If nothing else, I know that the speech impediment belongs to him, not Pearce. However, I was a bit miffed with all the discussion about his character working at The Torch. When do we ever see anyone else but Chloe, Pete, Clark, and Lana working on that thing? Speaking of which, does it still exist as a newspaper without Chloe there?

Lana's appearance at the Kent farm confused me, because there wasn't any indication that this wasn't a continuation of the last scene of Mortal. Not that I particularly wanted to view some sappy morning after thing, but I was all, "Wait, they boinked on the floor of Lana's living room... did they magically teleport back to the Kent farm?" I was, however, pleased that they were not shown sleeping in each other's arms. Gag me if they ever show that.

And while I enjoy Chloe again, I was a little upset that her entrance shortened Clark's getting yelled at for bringing Lana home (okay, that was intentionally worded to make her sound like a stray). More accurately, letting her spend the night in his bed. Martha and Bo Kent were really getting into him, and I was cheering for them for like the first time ever, wanting a big lecture on the sanctity of marriage and everything (remember, Clark, how upset your mom was when you married Alicia? You cried, slowly, but you cried. And you hadn't even slept with her). Maybe the Kents will see that Lana is a whore and separate them? *snorts* I love Clark's defense: "I've loved her since I was like 7, so it's okay that I just had sex with her under your roof." Way to win sympathy, Clark. If my kid said that, I'd emphasize things like puppy love and the difference between that and the kind of love it takes to want to sleep with someone. Granted since I don't have a kid I can say things like that. But anyway, I wanted to hear Clark get in trouble.

Did anyone else just not care that Clark died. He got shot and all I could think was, "See, if you had your powers, you wouldn't have gotten shot." Clark really just irritates me. Like at the end of Season 5 of Buffy, when Buffy died, I didn't care about her. Buffy was always my least favorite character on that show. The only reason I was upset at all was because Spike was crying. Spike shouldn't cry, and yet he was, over Buffy. That kinda hurt. (speaking of Spike, where the hell is James Marsters? I want the sexy older man on Smallville now!)

As Clark was crashing in the hospital room, I was really just bored. Signs a show isn't working: when the death of the main character is boring. Until, of course, Lionel started to react to the shocks. And then I was all, "OMG, are they actually going to reference Transference? Does Smallville have a past between the first meteor shower and now?" And then it was just Jor-El (or, Jerelle, as Clark says it) in Lionel's body. Meaning he shouldn't have had *super powers*, but, whatever. The show has never made sense.

Anyone else think it was really kinky that Jor-El chose Lionel's body? The body of the father of Clark's future enemy? (ex-boyfriend, whatever). Well, kinky isn't the right word, but something more specific than "off-kilter."

There was a big cross in the stained glass window behind the Kents when Lana came in all tear-striken. I've never noticed those windows before, in all the time that we've spent at the Smallville Medical Center. Lana came out, and all I could think was, "at least Clark didn't die a virgin." Am I terrible, or what? Then again since Clark has been boinking Lex for years, I guess I mean a virgin to het sex.

Poor Johnny Lewis. Yet another Smallville whacko. That blood splatter on the glass when Chloe shoots him was *way* more graphic than I ever expected this show to get. They rarely show sex, even with all the action Lex has gotten canonically, and yet blood splattering against the wall is okay. Kinda like Walmart, where you can buy a gun but the cds are edited for profanity.

I loved Lex's line "swept in under the rug," because all I could think was, "You mean like the producers of Smallville have done with every fucking thing that has ever happened on the show?!?!" *snicker* I amuse myself.

Luthorcest eyefucking when Lionel reveals himself to Lex. Loved his line, "wasn't I creative." So funny.

Oh, Clark and Chloe... why you two never got together is beyond me. That's like turning down prime rib and going for McDonald's hamburgers, choosing Lana over Chloe. Yeah Chloe sold Clark out, but she was never infected by a witch-princess-whatever and tried to kill him.

"I can't expect her to react like you did." Number one sign you're dating the wrong person: YOU CAN'T TRUST THEM. Chloe took the alien thing pretty much in stride. Lex would probably take it in stride. Lana has already been uncomfortable with the whole thing. You really think she's going to handle finding out you're an alien after you sleep with her a few more times? Chloe was dead on when she told him that if he can't tell her, it's never going to work.

And, by the way, least attractive thing on Smallville? Mopey!Clark. Dude, you have super powers. You're gorgeous. You have loving parents, devoted friends, etc. God forbid you enjoy it! Dump Lana, find someone who loves you for who you actually are and not who they perceive you to be, and just move on! Clark really needs to go on Oprah or something.

And, next week: Aquaman!!!!! Let's see how much they fuck up his character like they did with Kid Flash (they totally used the wrong boy- it shouldn't have been Bart). The dude next week had better be Arthur, not Garth. It probably will be since it said "Aquaman" (or whoever it's supposed to be- he's a character I don't know too much about- I'm much better with Garth).

The whole missile silo thing: Huh? I was grateful for Johnny Lewis, and I think he did a great job, but the whole story line was just so... kinda tacked on. Like every FoTW storyline since season 3.